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This letter was e-mailed to me:
 
I stumbled onto your blog by accident.  I was delaying my decision to look at porn and your website came up.  I don’t want to become addicted to porn and I hate being ruled by sex.  I guess I’m embarrassed to order your book.  I have no friends and use sex and food to deal with the loneliness and despair.  I’m so angry with God for the share number of problems on my plate.  I used to hear voices which I believed to be God for years.  Then it became apparent that they weren’t now I feel like I’m going back into that region again.   I’m very lonely and and I often suffer disappointments in my personal life and work and because of this i have an active fantasy life to escape the torture of real life.   This fantasizing (not always sexual) could be me achieving all the academic success or getting the man of my dreams or finally getting married. Anyway in the past God or something has said that such fantasizing is witchcraft.   Keep it mind in the past I once thought my mind was being read by people and after believing that for almost eight years I found out it was not true by finally opening up to someone.  Anyway what remains is the believe that fantasizing is akin to witchcraft.  What are your thoughts on the issue???  This letter must seem like madness but I can’t talk to anyone anymore, I need answers, I don’t want to burden my Mom with anymore questions.  I want it settled.
 
I don’t know if you’ll respond  on your website if so please leave out my name.

In His Power,
Minister Laneen A. Haniah
Anavah – the blog owner and author of
The Spirits of Sexual Perversion Handbook
www.victoriouslyfree.org 

Looking for a previous article? Click Here

Would you  like to become a born again believer in Yeshua/Jesus Christ and receive eternal salvation? Click Here    

Want to share a testimony? Click Here

Need advice about something? Click Here     

If you are interested in being a moderator or author for this weblog please  e-mail me at laneenhaniah@victoriouslyfree.org     

(Please be advised that if you post a comment to any article on this weblog, you will automatically be added to the mailing list, receiving weekly updates about this site. If you do not want to be automatically added to this list all you have to do is add this phrase in parenthesis at the beginning of your first comment only: “I do not wish to be added to the mailing list”. You only have to add this phrase to the very first comment you post. It will protect you from receiving updates. Thank you for your cooperation. ) ) 

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(This is a letter that was e-mailed to me from an anonymous source. The author is a female Minister of The Gospel.) 

Hello:

I stumbled upon your website while doing some research on-line.  I purchased your book and am looking forward to being blessed and transformed by it.  I frequented some of your blogs and was very much blessed by your ministry. I would like to acquire counsel on a matter…

I have a friend who I do believe God placed in my life.  She loves Jesus and spiritually we can dialog about the word and spiritual matters and it is awesome because most often I am the one imparting so it is nice to have someone who can counter share with me and we can explore the word, and God and destiny together.

My friend is married and I am single.  In the past we have not governed our relationship properly and at one point were getting our sexual needs met from the relationship.  In my effort to reorder the relationship with her and God, I refused to participate in these acts further which my friend was not happy with and really became very controlling and manipulative…..very Jezebelic to say the least.  This caused me to have to cut off contact all together for a season.  While in the midst of pressuring me she became pregnant and her and her husband had a beautiful baby boy. 

All of this happened over a three year span.  It was only after becoming pregnant that my friend realized she was out of order and needed to get delivered.  However, this was very challenging to me as I felt betrayed.  Even though she is supposed to have sex with her husband and not me and that was something I was wanting her to do, I was upset at the fact of her trying to pursue me and even becoming vicious and upset with me to the point of just being hateful and vindictive….I can’t begin to describe some of the things she has said and done to me in an effort to get me; to punish me for making a decision not to sleep with her any further

Now that my friend has acquired a perspective on our relationship, we have strived to work on restoring our friendship in a Godly fashion.  She now however, appears to have the perspective of diving in head first; her reasoning is she understands we can’t go back and she is not that person anymore, however, I have lots of cautions and challenges and need to and desire to take the process of restoring our friendship very slowly.

One of my biggest challenges is that I have some heart issues against her regarding her baby boy.  When talking to me, she calls him the miracle child because he is the reason she turned from the error of her ways and saw what she was doing was wrong, but for me, he reminds me of how she treated me and in some ways it almost feels like she cheated on me even though naturally that isn’t realistic since she is married and we weren’t supposed to be doing anything in the first place; not to mention, I was opting out of the relationship, but that is how my heart feels and I have not been able to get past it no matter how much we talk about it.  I know my main issues are how she treated me at that time and then bam…I’m pregnant…it almost felt like she did it to retaliate against me and hurt me although she said that she was really trying to work on her marriage and do what I was encouraging her to do which was to work on her marriage and get her needs met through her husband…so with her actions she was doing this but with her words and deeds towards me she was doing otherwise….. 

My other challenge is that she wants me to be in her kids and husband’s life and I would very much love this but I want to do it at my own pace and don’t want to be pressured into it.  Never the less, every now and again, she will try to create opportunities for this to occur and will make comments about her children as if they are asking about me which is not true because the boy has only seen me twice and once was a week or so ago so the only way he would be inquiring about me is if she is putting inferences in his mind as he doesn’t know me at all to be doing that… 

Not to mention her husband has always been challenged by my presence.  From the initial point she and I became friends and were nothing but friends, he has never cared for me and it was/is obvious.   He says she changes when she is around me and I concur but she doesn’t readily admit this although it’s obvious to me and to him.  Sometimes, I sort of feel like her change is because I am everything she ever wanted in a mate, as she will make remarks at times when her and her husband are at odds that, “I need you in a male form,” or, “I wish he was like you.” Though she says this she will deny this and contend that her love for me as like Jonathan and David in the bible….

Recently I went to my friend’s state on other business and I stayed a few days.  My friend would come to visit me and I would visit her and for the most part things were decent and in order.  At times she would lay on me or grab my hand; this is the first time we have seen each other physically in over a year so I am still striving to figure out where the boundaries reside.  I had to admit I was very uncomfortable.  I sort of feel like my friend doesn’t have to have sex…that really she just truly desires intimacy and since she isn’t getting it in her marriage she is willing to have it at any level.  So to her laying on me or wanting me to hold her or hold her hand is sisterly…I had expressed to her that for me, I needed time to sort out what is an appropriate level of physical contact and for the present moment didn’t want to participate in any at all, but that didn’t stop her from pushing the boundaries I felt was needed.  Nothing happened further than just her laying on me or holding my hand or trying to be close to me in some form but to me it was a subtle representation of past actions….it wasn’t the full blown manipulation but just enough where she could justify it when I brought it up and yes I did bring it up…and she surely justified it. 

She as well sent me a CD of Dr. So and So  preaching about female friendships once I returned home.  It was a powerful message on friendship and how women need other sisters as friends to help them through the journeys of life.  One portion Dr. So and So  spoke about being a single woman and how her friends meet her intimacy needs.  She wasn’t talking about sexually but that when she is struggling as a single women they will be there to talk and walk her through until she is able to stand on her own again.  Well my friend used this to try to tell me it was okay if we held hands and laid on one another and the like….she used it from the angle of me being single and it was okay if I got my intimacy needs met through her since she was my “sisterfriend”….

I have never shared this with anyone as I am a leader in my church and I am the problem bearer for everyone else around me.  So really I have been working out my own salvation on this one…just me and God….

I would truly appreciate your insight…

In His Power,
Minister Laneen A. Haniah
Anavah – the blog owner and author of
The Spirits of Sexual Perversion Handbook
www.victoriouslyfree.org 

Looking for a previous article? Click Here

Would you  like to become a born again believer in Yeshua/Jesus Christ and receive eternal salvation? Click Here    

Want to share a testimony? Click Here

Need advice about something? Click Here     

If you are interested in being a moderator or author for this weblog please  e-mail me at laneenhaniah@victoriouslyfree.org     

(Please be advised that if you post a comment to any article on this weblog, you will automatically be added to the mailing list, receiving weekly updates about this site. If you do not want to be automatically added to this list all you have to do is add this phrase in parenthesis at the beginning of your first comment only: “I do not wish to be added to the mailing list”. You only have to add this phrase to the very first comment you post. It will protect you from receiving updates. Thank you for your cooperation. ) ) 

(I will be checking out for the weekend, but I always like to leave you with a thought to ponder over the weekend. Feel free to leave comments but know that I will not be back in until Sunday night or Monday morning to respond. Please have a nice weekend. 🙂 )

Some of you may have been reading the post entitled: Anavah’s Answer: Which acts are permissable within the confines of marriage? I think I really owe everyone an apology for the direction that this post has gone in. It has turned into a rather unpleasant and possibly unedifying debate over the legality, or lack thereof, of oral sex within the confines of marriage. I failed to exercise proper wisdom and mature discernment in opening up this conversation about marital sex on this public forum. This is a topic that should be reserved for married people and be carried on by married people. What married people do in their beds should have never been opened up to be discussed by just anyone.

As I have read the many comments and strong view points on this topic, I realized my error. The truth of the matter is that people who are not married are not qualified to speak on this topic. I am sorry because I know that offends many of you who try to be good stewards of God’s Word, but I know that what I am saying is true about marriage being discussed among the married (and those divorced or widowed have wisdom to share as well in some instances).

The truth of the matter is that the marriage bed is so sacred that it cannot be seen or understood by those who have not entered in to it, or even those who have entered into illegally or untimely (meaning with the wrong spouse). It is like the Holy of Holies in the Temple of Yahweh. Only the priest were allowed inside and therefore only they knew what it looked like, what it felt like and understood the glory and sanctity of if. Even of those priest that did enter, it seems that few ever understood the fullness of its glory, but because they had been called to enter in, God’s grace and mercy was upon them to continue to explore and seek understanding of that sacred place.

When those who were not qualified or chosen tried to enter into the Holy of Holies, they were killed. I believe this is what happens to people who are not married, or those who are in a marriage not ordained by God, when they try to enter into the realm of understanding marital intimacy. They are killed by their own ignorance and lack of understanding; they are killed by the letter of the law not understanding the beautiful glory of marital intimacy. What’s worse is that often times people that step foot on the sacred ground of marital intimacy before the appointed time and without the appointed covenant partner, are often blinded for life to its true glory.

By virtue of the sheer ignorance of some of the comments that have been made concerning marital sex and oral sex within the confines of marriage in particular; especially how irrelevant scripture has been used as an axe to condemn — I know that we have looked into the hearts of those that have trespassed on the sacred ground of marital intimacy. I am actually quite sad for those that have done this and saddened that I had a part in compounding their ignorance by forcing them to further contemplate that which they had no right to ponder in the first place.

To look into marital intimacy before the appointed time, is similar to a child who peeks in on his or her parents while they are engaged in sexual intimacy. The child is often horrified and even devastated. The child cannot understand why Mommy and Daddy are touching their private parts together when they have taught others that it is naughty for anyone to see or touch your privates. They can’t understand why Mommy seems to be crying and Daddy seems to not care. The child does not understand the beauty and sanctity of this activity, which under any other circumstances would be completely inappropriate and totally and grossly perverse. The child does not understand and no matter how much you try to explain to him or her, that child will not understand, until they too one day enter into that sacred bed of marriage with their own spouse. Sometimes the child is so traumatized by the occurrence, that even many years later as an adult, that now grown child cannot understand the beauty and glory of  sexual intimacy.

It is best for those of you who are not married to leave this topic alone. You are all like children, struggling to understand something that you cannot possibly understand. Marital intimacy is a sacred place and what goes on in that sacred place is disturbing to those who don’t belong there. Therefore God has blinded the eyes of them that are not yet certified to see the beauty and glory of it and He will not open them up until the appointed time. No matter how much you seek to understand this sacred place, I’m afraid that you will not until your appointed time comes. I am further concerned that if you continue to trespass on this sacred ground, you will traumatize and devastate yourself beyond repair.

So I once again apologize for exposing all of you unmarried people to the sacred ground of marital intimacy. My heart was in the right place, wanting to help married couples learn how to sanctify and enjoy their marriage bed, but I think my efforts may have done more harm than good. If I ever open this topic up again, it will be in a private discussion to be addressed by married people only. For now, I pray that God will cleanse your hearts of all that you have seen and heard that you should not have and I pray His mercy on me for my error.

My Deepest Apologies,
Minister Laneen A. Haniah
Anavah – the blog owner and author of
The Spirits of Sexual Perversion Handbook
www.victoriouslyfree.org 

Looking for a previous article? Click Here

Would you  like to become a born again believer in Yeshua/Jesus Christ and receive eternal salvation? Click Here    

Want to share a testimony? Click Here

Need advice about something? Click Here     

If you are interested in being a moderator or author for this weblog please  e-mail me at laneenhaniah@victoriouslyfree.org     

(Please be advised that if you post a comment to any article on this weblog, you will automatically be added to the mailing list, receiving weekly updates about this site. If you do not want to be automatically added to this list all you have to do is add this phrase in parenthesis at the beginning of your first comment only: “I do not wish to be added to the mailing list”. You only have to add this phrase to the very first comment you post. It will protect you from receiving updates. Thank you for your cooperation. ) )

I wrote an article this past week about a certain sect of supposedly “Christian” gay and lesbians who had some radically disturbing ideas about Jesus. They claim that through masturbation they were drawn into a deeper relationship with Him. You can read that article here: Weekend Word: Masturbating with Jesus?

I didn’t know the article was going to go in the direction that it did. Although it was not my intention, it turned out to be a debate on whether or not a homosexual can be a Christian. Again, this was not my initial intent in publishing the article. I was more focused on the masturbation issue. However, since it did go in that direction I’d like to open this issue up for further discussion.

 Are the terms “homosexual” and “Christian” in direct contradiction and opposition to one another? Or, is it possible to be both? What are your thoughts?

In His Power,
Minister Laneen A. Haniah
Anavah – the blog owner and author of
The Spirits of Sexual Perversion Handbook
www.victoriouslyfree.org 

Looking for a previous article? Click Here

Would you  like to become a born again believer in Yeshua/Jesus Christ and receive eternal salvation? Click Here    

Want to share a testimony? Click Here

Need advice about something? Click Here     

If you are interested in being a moderator or author for this weblog please  e-mail me at laneenhaniah@victoriouslyfree.org     

(Please be advised that if you post a comment to any article on this weblog, you will automatically be added to the mailing list, receiving weekly updates about this site. If you do not want to be automatically added to this list all you have to do is add this phrase in parenthesis at the beginning of your first comment only: “I do not wish to be added to the mailing list”. You only have to add this phrase to the very first comment you post. It will protect you from receiving updates. Thank you for your cooperation. ) )

Someone sent me this article about a sect of Gay and Lesbian “Christians” from the Metropolitan Community Church and one of their leaders. I could not believe what I was reading:

 “My technique of meditative prayer was to envision Christ with me and experience him as a lover. Scott Haleman, Betty Dodson, and Joe Kramer argue that masturbation can be spiritual and can become a form of transcendental meditation. Masturbation can harness fantasies and sexual energy. When prolonged, it can stimulate and extend pleasure. When fantasies are focused into making love with Christ, the experience opens itself to a fundamental and profound consciousness of God. My visualizations of Jesus were certainly explicit, erotically envisioning various forms of making love to Jesus the Christ. I had sexual intercourse with Jesus. Sometimes he was the top, and sometimes he was the bottom. My relationship with Christ was mutual and deep. (Rev. Dr. Robert E. Goss, senior pastor of the MCC’s “Church of the Valley” in North Hollywood, CA. In his 2002 book, Queering Christ) ”

I am sorry to even have to repeat such filth, but I think it is important for us all to understand the depth of depravity that exists in the world today. I have heard unrepentive homosexuals say some far out things about Jesus and his supposed homosexual lifestyle with the apostles, but this by far surpasses anything I’ve heard before.

In my book, The Spirits of Sexual Perversion Handbook, I talk about the spirit of sexual fantasy and how it detaches one from reality. Notice how in the above article sexual fantasy is mentioned. I also talk about the spirit of lust and how once you are taken by lasciviousness (extreme lust), you often become deeply involved in witchcraft and spiritualism and are forever lost. Notice how in the above they talk about transcendental meditation, a common form of witchcraft.

I hate to keep pounding the pavement on the masturbation issue, but I believe it to be such a dangerous practice. Have you ever heard of a gateway drug? Marijuana is often referred to as a gateway drug because it has been scientifically proved that it is not physically addictive. It is however mentally and emotionally addictive. Furthermore, it has also been proved through studies that the use of marijuana often leads to heavier drug use, such as crack and heroin. Therefore it is called the gateway drug. I call masturbation “the gateway sex”. Like marijuana, there is nothing about masturbation that is physically addictive, but it extremely mentally and emotionally addictive. It is difficult to masturbate without it leading to other acts of sexual depravity, especially sexual fantasy. It is also a door opener for homosexuality, fornication, lust and all other forms of perversion.  The Bible says that we should give the devil no foothold. To all of you masturbation advocates, I would like to know why you would even want to toy around with this gateway sex called masturbation. Besides, how many practicing masturbators can honestly say that they do not fantasize while masturbating? If you think you can continue to masturbate and keep your sexual activity just at that level, you are fooling yourself!

I hope this will give you all something to think about concerning the dangers of masturbation because out of even those of us Christians that admit masturbation is a dangerous and unclean practice, very few of us really do what we have to do to get delivered from this activity. We say we want to stop, but do we really? Are you really willing to die to self, turn over your plate, turn off the TV and war with satan until you are free?

Have a lovely weekend. 🙂

In His Power,
Minister Laneen A. Haniah
Anavah – the blog owner and author of
The Spirits of Sexual Perversion Handbook
www.victoriouslyfree.org 

Looking for a previous article? Click Here

Would you  like to become a born again believer in Yeshua/Jesus Christ and receive eternal salvation? Click Here    

Want to share a testimony? Click Here

Need advice about something? Click Here     

If you are interested in being a moderator or author for this weblog please  e-mail me at laneenhaniah@victoriouslyfree.org     

(Please be advised that if you post a comment to any article on this weblog, you will automatically be added to the mailing list, receiving weekly updates about this site. If you do not want to be automatically added to this list all you have to do is add this phrase in parenthesis at the beginning of your first comment only: “I do not wish to be added to the mailing list”. You only have to add this phrase to the very first comment you post. It will protect you from receiving updates. Thank you for your cooperation. ) )

Well, we had a wonderful exploration of masturbation the last two weeks with our question of the week. If you missed out on it, you need to check it out. But I have in my spirit for this week to discuss marital sex. So our question for this week, or unitl the Holy Spirit says otherwise: “Which sex acts are permissable within the confines of marriage?”

I have a feeling that this one will be interesting and passionate. Please post in love and remember to include scripture when you can. This is all about finding out the Biblical perspective on Christian sexuality. So let’s blog!

If you are looking for a previous article it can be found on the Archives page here: https://christiansexuality.wordpress.com/archives/

 If you would like to become a born again believer in Yeshua/Jesus Christ and receive eternal salvation, please visit the Born Again page here: https://christiansexuality.wordpress.com/how-to-be-saved/         

 If you are interested in being a moderator or author for this weblog please e-mail me at laneenhaniah@victoriouslyfree.org     

(Please be advised that if you post a comment to any article on this weblog, you will automatically be added to the mailing list, receiving weekly updates about this site. If you do not want to be automatically added to this list all you have to do is add this phrase in parenthesis at the beginning of your first comment only: “I do not wish to be added to the mailing list”. You only have to add this phrase to the very first comment you post. It will protect you from receiving updates. Thank you for your cooperation.)

 

I know I have not done any current events lately, but this was just too sick for me to not post it. A US prosecutor, you know the ones who supposedly catch bad guys, turned out to be a pretty bad guy himself. He got busted in a a sting to catch internet child predators while trying to arrange to have sex with a five year old girl!!!

 This is definitely the spirit of sexual fantasy. The spirit of sexual fantasy detaches you from reality to the point that you no longer realize that your actions are real. You see your actions only as a part of your fantasy and are detached from the reality of the consequences. If you are involved in sexual fantasy or pornography please reach out to me. I can help you. I don’t want you to end up like this man.

Read the article for yourself here:

http://www.miamiherald.com/775/story/242448.html

 

If you are looking for a previous article it can be found on the Archives page here:

https://christiansexuality.wordpress.com/archives/

 If you would like to become a born again believer in Yeshua/Jesus Christ and receive eternal salvation, please visit the Born Again page here: https://christiansexuality.wordpress.com/how-to-be-saved/         

 If you are interested in being a moderator or author for this weblog please e-mail me at laneenhaniah@victoriouslyfree.org     

(Please be advised that if you post a comment to any article on this weblog, you will automatically be added to the mailing list, receiving weekly updates about this site. If you do not want to be automatically added to this list all you have to do is add this phrase in parenthesis at the beginning of your first comment only: “I do not wish to be added to the mailing list”. You only have to add this phrase to the very first comment you post. It will protect you from receiving updates. Thank you for your cooperation.)